We’ve all been here, or at least a good portion of us who are empathetic enough to join a vomit bath just because someone else got sick. I know, gross, but it got your attention, and it makes sense. I write about this today because I’ve been dealing with grieving a death, and others grieving the lives they’re living.
I read too often on Facebook that they are not worth anyone, that no one would miss them if they off’d themselves, and various other self-deprecating one-liners all too common in media. I’ve heard it said (and so have you, so don’t lie) that we are our own worst critics. Yes, and no, and here’s why. There are traditions our society has held onto that no longer serve us emotionally. We have morphed, and grown as a species, but not our values. Often times, the emotional patterns I’ve seen with those around me have been brought about by outside sources. Anyone ever question what is meant by being caged? Here’s what I’ve learned it means from my perspective:
Being caged is, in essence, held to beliefs brought on by those it works for. For instance, your parents can’t get over the fact that you believe everyone’s equal and deserving of happiness, just like our four-fathers believed, or as our constitution reflects, and they grew up in a whole other world. So, they don’t see the changes this world has gone through, and they have not followed suit on change emotionally, and therefore are essentially blinded to what their beliefs that have become ingrained in them are doing to those who have evolved.
I’m not old enough to be a baby boomer, that’s my parent’s generation, but I have to say that as someone who is among the evolved humans in our time, I know what is happening to those who are like me; we are never going to see things the way our ancestors, or our parents do. The parents who evolved with us, or before us, we commend you. However, the old ways don’t suit us, anymore. The gilded cages we’re struggling to free ourselves from do nothing but harm for us. I’m seeing more and more of those like me breaking free of their family’s caged traditions and beliefs. It is sad, but good at the same time. This doesn’t mean our families are toxic, or not good for us, it means we’re on a different frequency, and new ties need to be explored and made.
I know I have not given any names in my posts as of yet, but those who are struggling out there, I feel your pain, and I offer my strength to you. Do what you must, but don’t do it out of anger, or to hurt others as you’ve been hurt. Your parents/families do love you, and do want the best for you. It’s just they can’t see the world through our crystal clear eyes, and that’s not their fault. They still deserve love from us, as it is a very pure and crystal clear love. They need that love if they are to ever awaken and understand why the bonds have, in fact, changed.