We all dread that news; ya know, the news where something unexpected happened to someone you know. Just yesterday, I was told news that sent chills up my spine all the way up to the hairline-a friend my age has had a heart attack and went through triple bypass surgery.
The first thought that went through my mind was, really? Seriously? This isn’t a nightmare? Sadly, no. It’s not one you can wake up from…
I admit, I haven’t been close to this old friend, not in recent years, but the caring for him has never stopped. I’ve known him since college, and have cared about him and his family since, even though I don’t play card games with him anymore, as he brings out the worst in me when I play with him…
However, I’m not about to let those old feelings get between how I feel about him this moment. I feel scared, and I’m worried what else could be next. I feel like all those I have surrounded myself with are on the verge of dying off around me, while I’m still fairly healthy myself. It causes me not only to feel old, but lonely as well.
The other thought is when there’s a relationship that went sour, and you hear about that person going through hardships without you. I remember hearing that an ex-friend of mine lost a parent recently, and tried to contact me to regain ties with me. Sadly, due to mistakes, huge mistakes, she’d made in the past with our relationship, I had issues forgiving her, and never responded. She recently messaged me, and said she’s moving on, and understands that I chose not to accept her back in my life because I don’t believe she’d changed; in other words, she finally got the message. I breathed a sigh of relief, and finally feel released by her. I am thankful that is over, and do feel for her as I lost a parent a little over a year ago myself; it’s never easy going through that.
It may seem clichéd, or annoying how often we’re told to appreciate people while they’re here and such, but it is, in fact, true. The fact that we all watched as both Carrie Fisher, and Debbie Reynolds pass away within hours of each other, we never really know when it’s time for someone we care about.
So, if you have friends/family you miss, care a lot about, and haven’t taken the time to spare for them, do it when you can. Don’t look at it the way your ego tells you too. Unless you’re able to speak to the dead, you will most certainly never get the opportunity to speak to them again until you join them later when you finally hear that trumpet sound.
I now no longer take friends, or family for granted. It’s not wise, as they are living, breathing, and slowly dying beings themselves. Anything can happen; hell, my sister, who is only two years older had two strokes, and was recently diagnosed with liver cancer, and expiration date! Talk about a slap in the face, make your heart sink, and spit suddenly becomes solid and hard-to-swallow, news!
Yeah, forgiveness may be a factor in all this, but in essence, what needs to be understood is that they love you, too, and more than likely are in the same boat, but just haven’t taken the time. Might as well be you who calls/texts/emails them. Go for it! What have ya got to lose, other than reopening a partially closed door, or receiving closure for certain, and the chance to move on. Don’t let fear stop you, it’s not nearly as bad as you think. As we all see alongside the famous icon for Nike, just do it.